Kansha Kangeki Amearashi

感謝カンゲキ雨嵐

Kansha Kangeki Amearashi...It's thanks to the RainStorm that I found myself again.

金曜日, 9月 26, 2003
  Friendships never last 4ever, do they? I really feel that there has to be something seriously wrong with me...why do I irritate ppl so easily?

It's not going to last so long, as usual...blow, why can't I keep the friends i make in this school? In fact, it's the friends whom I made in pr sch that lasted...

Alisia, Zhehao, Lim Xian, nicholas, Patrisia...I wish I didn't lose contact with Chun Shu...:) Wen Jie too. I wish we could all meet again, be in the same class/school again...I wish everything was just like it was in P6. I can't stand the class politics...

Maybe I'm just being oversensitive but why do I feel that the friends I have in this school are beginning to ignore me too? Did I do something really despicable unknowingly?

There's something wrong...I just don't know how to interact with ppl...

I can't wait to get outof this school...must study really hard and get into a gd JC. preferably, certain ppl frm this school won't follow me to the JC I go into...

1 more year...just 1 more yr...one more year to endure...probably by the end I won't have any friends. Again. I feel so lost...I know that u can't let friends take over ur life, but they still are impt...

Feeling the urge to write a long letter to Alisia and Chun Shu...haven't written to them in more than a yr...at 1st we wrote to each other regularly, but as we got busier, we didn't write as often...

Is this what being in a good school is like? Somehow I feel that a lot of ppl have lost their humanity...maybe I'm a neighbourhood sch girl at heart...it seems that ppl in neighbourhood schools are so much more real...so much more human...

yeah, I miss the guys...the way we'd trade punches (ok, I was beating them up lol), the jokes...

It's no use looking back. Those days will never return. Just when i thought of opening myself up again...won't ppl find it weird? My way of being friendly is probably weird to them. I keep saying the wrong things. i irritate the hell out of even my gd friends...

Can't let this distract me. Got to do well in this. Got to do well in 'O' levels. Got to get into my dream JC. Hopefully I'll meet my gd pri sch friends there again.

I get the feeling she's avoiding me, ignoring me...

I'm such a bore. Why can't i ever talk interestingly? I try cracking jokes but they come out sounding so lame.

Ppl change, don't they? Someon'e changed so much...there's still a bit of the old her left, but there's so little left. She's no longer the sweet girl I used to know...

Why can't I stop looking back at the past, and look ahead instead?

I know I'm probably being naive, but I still trust the ppl in this class. I don't hate them, though I was very upset by their behavior...I still believe some of them still have good hearts, no matter how terribly they treat me. They just think it's cool to follow what the popular ppl are doing...or maybe they really believe it... I don't know, I feel so numb...

How do you stop being irritating when u don't know what's making u irritating?
To watch any one else and follow what she does is copying...I want to be me...but is this the real me? This boring, irritating girl...

Finally got that A2 for A Maths...so glad I even passed...:)

Just in a very nostalgic, melancholy mood today...

Got my Myojo, Wink Up and Duet...looking forward to nxt issue's duet!! It's gonna have Arashi on the cover again, don't beat me to it!!!

See how fast my mood swings? Even when I'm upset the longest i take to get over it is a day...it's when I feel hopeful again, hopeful that things will somehow right themselves, or that I'll come up with some way to put things right...

Lately I've had this urge to try to put things right. It's like that time when I accidentally broke 2 of Chingyi's testtubes...She'd said it was ok, but I felt really guilty, should have been more careful...the only solution I could come up with was to replace the 2 tubes I broke with 2 of my own. :) And it made me feel much better, it was my fault and I should be the one who rights it. 
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On happy days, as cheerful as a rainbow Or on days that rage like a storm You'll always be there for me

ARCHIVES
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—’ Arashi/Tochuu Gesha “r’†‰ºŽÔ
From album Iza, Now!‚¢‚´‚ÁA‚m‚‚—I
J-Storm
Release date 21 july2004
(64kbps)1.95mb

途中下車

朝もや 旅立ちのホームに
内緒で駆けつけた 
見慣れた笑顔が待っていた
ジリリ 別れのベールが鳴り
大粒の涙が 真夏の風に消えた

外は晴れ 夢はどこ?巡り合うのは誰?
閉まりかけていたドアの向こう側に 見た!

*名前も忘れるほど遠くなってしまうなら
ネクタイを外し途中下車したまま

この街の思い出が 何気ない 一日が
守るべき何か そっと 包んでゆく

突き出す きれいなビルの影
くたびれた Yシャツ 
交差点の中立っている
時の流れに追い越され
落ち込んだ午後には あの夏に咲いてた True Song

人はなぜない物を探し続けてるの?
悩む事さえ忘れかけている My Life

#あの日乗り込んだ列車は 行き先もないままに
不器用な呼吸でまだ走ってゆく

信じることに疲れて 1人眠りたい夜
途中下車したまま ゆっくり 時が 止まる
全ての街に日が昇る
希望の鐘(ね)を打ち鳴らせ

今信じる勇気が 魂の輝きが
守るべき何か そっと 包んでゆく

(*印 くりかえし)
(#印 くりかえし)
走ってゆく

Tochuu Gesha

Asa moya Tabi tachi no homu ni
Naisho de kaketsuketa
Minareta egao ga matteita
Jiriri wakare no beru ga nari
Ootsubu no namida ga Manatsu no kaze ni kieta
(The morning haze At the starting point of my journey,
I set out in secret
As the familiar smile waits
"JIRIRI", the departing bell rings
And big drops of tears disappear in the winds of midsummer)


Soto wa hare yume wa doko? Meguriau no wa dare?
Shimarikaketeita doa no mukou gawa ni Mita!
(It's fine outside, where are my dreams? Who is it that I'll meet?
On the other side of the closing doors, I saw it!
)

*Namae mo wasureru hodo tooku natte shimau nara
Nekutai wo hazushi tochuu gesha shita mama
Kono machi no omoide ga nanigenai ichi nichi ga
Mamorubeki nani ga sotto tsutsunde yuku
(If I ever go so far away that I forget even [her] name
I'll take off my necktie, and as I get down from the car midjourney,
Gently embrace the memories of this street, the day I took for granted
And what I'm supposed to protect
)

Tsukidasu Kirei na biru no kage
Kutabireta Y shatsu 
Kousaten no naka tatteiru
Toki no nagare ni oikosare
Ochikonda koko ni wa
Ano natsu ni saiteta True Song
(The shadow of a clean building pops into sight
A worn out white shirt
Standing in the middle of the crossroads,
Having been caught up and surpassed by the flow of time,
Is the True Song that bloomed in the calm afternoon
Of that summer.
)

Hito wa naze nai mono wo sagashi tsuzuketeru no?
Nayamu koto sae wasurekaketeiru My Life
(Why do people keep looking for what they do not have?
My Life, where I forget even my troubles
)

#Ano hi norikonda resha wa iki saki mo nai mama ni
Bukiyou na kokyuu de mada hashitte yuku
(The train I boarded that day without any destination in mind
Still rushes on with its awkward breaths)


Shinjiru koto ni tsukarete hitori nemuritai yoru
Tochuu gesha shita mama yukkuri toki ga tomaru
Subete no machi ni hi ga noboru
Kibou no ne wo uchi narase
(Tired of believing, nights I want to sleep alone
As I alight from the car mid-journey, time slowly comes to a stop
The sun rises in every street
Striking the bell of hope
)

Ima shinjiru yuuki ga Tamashii no kagayaki ga
Mamoru beki nani ka sotto tsutsundeyuku
(Right now, I embrace gently
The courage to believe, the radiance of spirit
And what I should protect
)
(repeat *)
(repeat #)

Hashitte yuku
(Rushing on)

Translation by Celste(Evon)


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